Back in the Saddle Again

Hello, it's been awhile, hasn't it? A few years since I've stepped into this space to pour my heart out and share my stories. And so much has happened! A return to scholastic life, a tumble on a trail run leading to a broken kneecap and surgery, a terrifying dance with cancer leading to more surgeries, the dreaded chemo and, finally, a decision to settle down for a moment and catch our breath, regroup and get our feet back under us. Maybe one of these days I'll have the courage to rehash some of the awful stuff that I slogged through but, right now, all I want to do is take a deep breath and begin moving forward again.

So, let's just start from here, with here being a little Montana town tucked in between snowy mountains on the banks of a big river. My other half has accepted a job which will keep us in one place for awhile. We've been doing the traveling road show for so long now that we both are wondering how we'll do with our feet planted in one place for more than one season but, fingers crossed! And since we are more than ready for a bit less excitement (read: stress) in our lives, we're making the decision to leap back into our old "normal" (read: baking in a full-size oven. Yippee!). First, sell the RV, then find a place to call home and, last, settle in. Not a bad place to settle, that's for sure.

I'm feeling a bit rusty at the ol' blogging thang so please bear with me while I work out the kinks and get back into my rhythm. I hope to reconnect with old friends and maybe make some new friends along the way. And, oh, I have lots to share; from exploring this corner of Montana to my trials and tribulations of mastering artisan bread with a sourdough starter (help!). Is anybody out there willing to ride along with me? If so and if you're ready, let's saddle up! We're off to new adventures!

3 Weeks and 2 Days Until Liberation

Sometimes you just want to go home. Now, don't get me wrong, I love this traveling lifestyle. I still enjoy the waking up in new places and that moment of, "Where the heck are we?" and soaking in the scents and smells and sights and, well, different-ness of a new location, the peculiarities that make it so NOT home. It's fun, exciting, always an adventure. But, so far, no matter where I am, no matter what I'm doing, after a few months, it always hits. That longing for familiar. The longing for those sights, sounds and smells that set your heart to singing. And then you know...it's time to go home.

I haven't made it a secret that this assignment has been a challenge for me which makes the desire to get the hell out of Dodge (or Clovis, as the case may be) that much more intense. In one of my melancholy moods, I happened to pick up an old journal and I read something I wrote that really just sums it up.

 I remember the day so clearly. It was May of last year and we were on our assignment in Billings, MT. It was a Saturday and we had headed off into the mountains to soak up a gorgeous spring day. I was sitting in the sun on the bank of the Stillwater River while Erik chased fish and the dogs flopped on the grass beside me.

Erik and Riley flyfishing on the Stillwater River

May 8, 2010 - The leaves on the trees are bursting out, the birds are so active, the Swiftwater rushing by makes such a beautiful melody. What a gorgeous day! Mid-40's, sun is shining, snow on the ground around me but patches of spring grass warmed by the sun offers an inviting space for the dogs to stretch out on.

Oh, Montana, how I love you! Fickle though you may be, your beauty, your generosity makes the temper tantrums worthwhile. I am already feeling the loss of leaving you and moving on to our next stop even though I know adventure awaits. The gypsy life is a strange one. The thrill of waking up and wondering, "Where am I today?", the discovering of new places, new people never gets old.

Yet, I can't help looking back over my shoulder as I walk away at what I'm leaving behind. That sense of melancholy knowing you'll go on without me while I'm gone. Your snows will melt, your flowers will bloom and I'll be far away finding different flowers, different spaces but none to compare with those of my beautiful Montana.

Montana Wildflowers

 So, there you have it. And in 3 weeks and 2 days, we're heading back to Montana for the summer. Ahhhhhh......(soul-deep sigh).

Yep, I love traveling, love moving on. But, you know what I love even better?

Going home.

Deep Freeze

Frozen Window

It was minus 25 degrees this morning. And I live in a motorhome. I really feel it’s about time to rethink my life.

Really, if I wanted to live through temps like this, I could have gone home to Montana and at least had the pleasure of beautiful scenery, things to do and friends and family to shack up with.

To say I’m cold is an understatement. My poor dogs won’t even go outside voluntarily, their paws freezing within minutes. I’ve resorted to carrying a bath towel when we head outside so that when the doggie dance of trying to get frozen paws out of contact with frigid ground begins, I can rush over and offer a brief respite by throwing the towel on the ground and letting then stand on it like a barefoot child on a hot, sandy beach.

Chloe huddled in her blankets

Between the necessary but dreaded dog walks, my day consists of huddling under my down blanket, only surfacing to heat up tea or re-cover a shivering dog.  I finally had to give up on my daily ritual of vacuuming up dog hair and dusting down surfaces as my space heater and microwave are running on overtime. Heck, maybe the extra hair will give us another layer of insulation. I can only hope.

I watch the winter storm warnings flash across the tv screen telling us to take shelter, cover skin and avoid staying outside for longer than 30 minutes at a time. I watch the forecasts with bated breath wondering when this deep freeze will come to an end…and wondering if I’m going to cave before it does and finally drag my frozen extremities and canine companions to the nearest hotel in hopes of finding a hot, hot shower and warm toes.

Ugly grey sweats, down booties and dog hair

For now, though, I’m hunkered down, encased in layers and layers of high-tech thermal sportswear topped by the ugliest grey sweat pants you will ever see with my feet covered by my down, campsite booties and strands of errant dog hair sprinkled about like sequins. And with all this down time on my hands, I decided to teach myself to knit. It’s not pretty but if I keep the down blanket pulled up over my head, my fingers stay warm enough to work my way through the stitches and the bright green yarn reminds me of spring. Oh man, I can’t wait until spring!

Doesn't that green remind you of spring?

Erik came home from work last night and said disgustedly, “You know, this time last year we were in Palm Springs.” Oh, lordy, I just wanted to cry. I remember Palm Springs and, even better, Ventura and the beach and warm sand and dolphins swimming and hot sunshine and…hold on, I’m getting myself worked up. But we’re not in Palm Springs. For better or worse, we picked Clovis, NM to winter in so here we sit, frozen inside our little ice-cube of a motorhome.

But, then I think, honestly, who am I to complain? Yes, this sucks. It really, REALLY sucks BUT we are so lucky that we have the option of choosing. I wonder how many people are stuck right where they are with no hope of choosing something different? How many people here in Clovis are shivering right along with us but, for them, this is it? In a month or two, we get to move on but this is their reality. Erik and I are so darn blessed that we have a choice. We can choose where we go and where we spend our time on earth. So, yes, next time we will probably choose Southern California beaches or desert over the New Mexican plains for winter. And maybe I’ll choose the hotel over freezing my ass off tonight but, for now, I’m going to pour myself a glass of wine and pull the down blanket over my head and toast to the fact that we have choices and, like it or not, we chose this crazy, surprising, wonderful, lonely, frustrating, unbelievable gypsy life. So raise your glasses, friends, and let's drink to choices!

I choose this!

The Grand Adventure

For all of those who have wondered where the heck I've been and why I haven't posted for the last few months (by the way, thank you for the emails!), I am happy to tell you that Erik and our menagerie are off on a Grand Adventure! We quit our day jobs, put our house up for rent, bought a motorhome and packed up our 3 wacky dogs and have hit the road.

How are we able to do this, you ask? Well, because I have a kick-ass husband who is a very talented Physical Therapist, he was able to sign up to be a "contract" PT and, thus, can choose from assignments all over the US. The assignments are usually 3 months in length so it's a great way for us to experience an area that we wouldn't necessarily want to move to but have always wanted to get a taste of...like the South or New England or Alaska or New Mexico (can you tell I'm excited?).

So, our plan is to be on the road for the next couple of years and we've started a blog if you're interested in tracking our progress. I will still be posting to this blog but it will be a little more sporadically.

Thanks again to all of you who have shown your support and interest in my crazy ramblings and I look forward to keeping you enteretained as I progress on our Grand Adventure!